Invoking the Power of Your NO

Some of us are very reluctant to use our No. I've brought this up in earlier post stating that apologizing when saying "no" to an unreasonable request is unreasonable and in this post where I bring up the fact that we let ourselves be manipulated, in part, due to our inability to say "no". Can this whole no thing be taken to the extreme? Of course it can. When you're hired to do a job it would be ridiculous to say, the day after you're hired, that you refuse to do it simply because you're not in the mood. The no should come more often than you think though. It should come when you are put in a spot that you inherently know what you should do, but someone else insist otherwise, or tries to convince you that they know better. This goes back to the quote in Fincher's "The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo" -

"It's hard to believe that fear of offending me is stronger than the fear of pain, but you know what? It is."

I've been thinking about our reluctance to tell others "no" even when it's beneficial for us to do so and even when it would be destructive for us not to say it. It started when I listened to this podcast where Lewis Howes interviews the author of The Power of No's James Altucher. If you're not familiar with this subject, this podcast is a good place to start. I also have watched the video below a few times and some excellent points are made on how "no" is a part of life's journey if you are to grow.

The metamorphosis that Elliott Hulse is talking about here as far as Friedrich Nietzsche is concerned is best summed up here. I'm not a fan of Nietzsche but I can see where Elliott is coming from making the comparisons in this video. In the story "Thus Spoke Zarathustra" by Nietzche, he claims that "God is dead." This is because he believes in order to become the Ubermensche, one must get rid of the "Thou Shalts" and this beast of burden thinking. 

I know that in the case of Nietzsche, he's talking of an oppressive religious system. Jesus himself was against the repressive religious system of the Pharisees. Bringing wrongful ways of thinking down does not, however, mean that God is dead. If you really want freedom out from under a 'thou shalt' or a boss then Christianity would be the most reasonable track. In order to say no to the world and slay the dragon you have to remember who the dragon is and remember that no matter how powerful you think you are, you will still worship something. 

When Nietzsche says that we are to become like children again with a new yes, he's talking of a natural cycle that happens on a more personal level in people's lives, whether they believe in a God or not. The older you get, the more likely you are able to see through people's bull and give out more NO's then yeses, the wiser you get the more likely you are to accept that you don't know everything but you're willing to recreate yourself with new knowledge that you, yourself have tested instead of simply accepting what's been passed down to you. 

Related Books:
The Power of No: Because One Little Word Can Bring Health, Abundance, and Happiness
Pulling Your Own Strings
Boundaries: When to Say Yes, How to Say No to Take Control of Your Life